Updates from Ed Ross

We started today's Quiet Time by watching one of Rob Bell's Nooma Videos. I'd heard a lot about these, but never actually seen one myself. They are about ten minutes long, and cover an aspect of Christianity in an interesting way. The video we watched today focussed on a story about a father who held his baby son close to him during a heavy rain storm. This was a pretty powerful story, which reminded us about how storms can come in all our lives, but God just wants to hold us close, and whisper to you: "I love you, I'm close to you, we're going to get through this together". We then were asked to think about people back home who we thought would do anything for us, and then think about if we thought God would do the same for us. Do you have someone like that - who would do anything for you?

We then had our weekly prayer session for other people (intersession, as I've previously mentioned). Today we focussed on the situation in India, and the persecution of the Christians there. It is great to know that the prayers said by a few people in England on a YWAM DTS course can have an impact in another country, with people we have never met.

After a break we moved on to our second day of hearing about the Father Heart of God. We had to think about what we could know about God, if we knew nothing to start off with. The Bible has a lot to say about God: He wants to bring life to us, He wants to bring fun, joy and comfort. He is persistent, trustworthy and creative. He also reveals Himself as Father. I guess if you've never had a good father figure in your life, you might have a hard time relating to God as Father. I count myself as blessed in that I have more than one fantastic father figures, including my actual Dad, who is great. The teaching overall was really good. Although they are called "Lectures", it isn't like being at university. We all get a say in what happens, if we want, and have many opportunities to share our experiences and knowledge with the class.

We had further teaching on the Father Heart of God, focussing on God's Story (as we know it so far). I was wondering during this about how much the rest of the world knows about the historical figures in the Bible - Abraham, Joseph, Moses etc. I was pleased later in the day when I randomly stumbled on a page in the book that talked exactly about this subject. I don't think it was a coincidence that I just happened on that page on the day I was thinking about this subject.

We also looked at God through the story of "The Prodigal Son", which can be found in Luke 15:11-31. There is so much here that talks about God's character. The father was willing to humble himself and welcome his estranged son back into his family. He was willing to let the son go in the first place, and not force him into anything he didn't want to do. There is a lot more that could be said on this passage. It is worth investigating for yourself.

After lunch we took part in our usual "Community Care" duties. This time I washed the sinks while the two girl cleaned the toilets and floors. I always seem to take a lot longer no matter which cleaning task I'm doing. I guess they are just more efficient than me! We managed to get all the toilets and showers cleaned in about an hour though, which was good going. After that, I tidied the bedroom I'm in a bit, preparing for the meeting we had in the evening.

I read some more of the book "Blue like Jazz". It really challenges me when it comes to my views on what a Christian "should" look like, and how they should talk about their spirituality/walk with God. The author sometimes seems to my knee-jerking view to not even be a Christian, which is my error, and something I have to work out with God. He certainly is a Christian, as he professes in the book. It is scary reading sometimes. I just don't know what he's going to say next. He's had so many interesting experiences and friends. He's like the Jessica Fletcher of Christian Spirituality.

In the evening, we had a meeting in my bedroom for all the guys on the course. These will continue weekly during the course, and be a time when we can share our thoughts/struggles with life, and pray for each other, as well as being a time just to process what we have learnt, and grow closer together, as men. I really enjoyed this first session. I was quite excited, as it has been a couple of months since I've been in a similar group. I was in a group in my church in Portsmouth (we called them "Cell groups"), and I miss it. To have a group of people around you who you can trust, and share your thoughts and struggles with is a very useful and recommended thing. In tonight's session, we had to write a few things about ourselves for the visiting speakers to get to know us, and we talked about how our days have been, as well as praying for each other.

"Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®, copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved."

Today was the start of our proper lecture series.

After Quiet Time, in which we focused on Psalm 19, had a time of sung worship with the whole base, and then we started our first lecture on "The Father Heart of God". We had an unexpected first lesson: we had to go around the group, and introduce ourselves and say something about the place we came from. We also had to mention someone who we miss. After that we had to think for a few minutes about how we saw God, and then we had a break.

When we came back, we were asked to take some magazines provided for us, and some colouring crayons and glue, and use the images from the magazines and the other material to produce a collage representing how we see God. This was quite a fun exercise. It was a bit like being in school again, but not having the pressure of being assessed at the end of it. It was funny how we managed to use magazines that has not been intended for this purpose. For example, I found images from National Geographic, such as an hotel porter carrying lots of luggage on a trolley. This reminded me of how God can (and wants to) take all our burdens and leave us free from our past, so we can have a great future with Him. I also found images from fashion magazines, such as a selection of watches. These got me thinking about God's timing. I've seen recently, with things like starting this YWAM DTS course, and getting together with my Girlfriend, that God's timing is perfect. It might not always be what we expect, but it is right.

I sat with some of the Canadian students at lunch, as well as the German student. It is nice to hear about other people's countries and cultures. It also makes you think about your own. For example, in Canada, they have a national holiday, "Victoria Day", in remembrance of our Queen Victoria. However, we do not have this holiday! Also, when it comes to food, there is a vast difference throughout the world (though it seems there may be some general themes which slight geographical changes too). The Canadians have lots of nice sounding dishes. Each week the school has a day to celebrate a different country, and we have a meal based on that country. I'm looking forward to the Canadian day. I am one of three English students on this course, so quite often I feel like I'm the foreigner. This is a good thing, I think, as when on the outreach phase, it won't seem so odd. I still don't know where I'll be going. The course leader has been giving broad hints. For example, the location will be somewhere on the planet Earth, but will not be Australia, New Zealand, or the Arctic.

At 2pm, once again we started the afternoon "Community Care" activities. I cleaned the toilets, while the other two people in the team I am on cleaned the sinks, mirrors, and floors.

At 4pm we started a session on Child Protection. This covered the topics we need to be aware of to spot the signs of children being abused. It is not a nice subject to think about, and it is upsetting to think that we have to be aware of such topics, but the session was very well run and informative. Having worked with youth for about eight years now, I have covered most of the subjects before, but it is always useful to have a reminder, and get to know the specific information relating to this location, such as the people we need to speak to if we suspect anything. I just pray that we will not have to use any of the information we learnt in this session. Also during this time, we found out that we may be having a trip to a local theme park: Thorpe Park. This should be a fun trip, and a great way to get to know the other students a bit more.

Just before dinner I joined in a game of volleyball. It is fun to get out an active a bit during each day. It is also helping to get to know some of the other people on the base. It is an initially confusing situation here. The DTS students and staff are not the only residents here at Holmsted Manor. There are also people who look after the grounds, hospitality, kitchen and probably various other tasks I haven't even heard of yet. There are also some people who just seem to "be" here, without having any specific purpose. It good practice to have so many new people around me all the time. It should help with relaxing around people and becoming even more confident in unusual situations.

Today has gone really quickly. I guess now that we are getting into the swing of things, and we are getting used to each other, the schedule and the environment, it will become easier to switch off and not think about time passing. I'm still really enjoying the course, and am so glad I'm here.

It is not just me blogging my way though the course. There are at least three other students that I know of blogging: Laura Piekos, and Stephanie and Joseph Brinkman. You can read their blogs too to get more views on how the course is going and what we have done.

Thanks again for reading. Please feel free to add a comment. I hope you had a great weekend and have a fun week ahead.

Today I went to a local church in the morning, rested, played some volleyball and a game of Uno in the evening. This will probably be the last post I provide on a Sunday, as I'm planning to "live Analog" on Sundays, as per Episode 73 of the Geeks and God Podcast. It should be good for me to have one day away from anything technical. I wonder if I can make it!

Next week we are starting the first full week of actual lectures, and we will be studying "The Father Heart of God", which should be good. Have a great week.

Today was a great day of rest. After breakfast I chilled out on the grass outside the house, enjoying the beautiful sunshine and clear blue sky. I read the whole of the Biblical book 'Ephesians', which was fun. It speaks of how God has planned for us to be a part of His Kingdom. He is in control, and eventually, everything will be back to how He wants it. Now we as Christians should live a life worthy of the name, and show in our actions what we know in out hearts.

In the afternoon, my parents came to see me. I'm very different to the other students on the YWAM DTS course I'm on: most of them are doing this course and moving away from their parents. For me, I've lived the past 8 years away from my parents while at university and working in Portsmouth, and now is a chance to meet up with them more often, as they live about 10 minutes or so from Holmsted Manor. The weather has been excellent today, which meant we were able to have a nice time outside in a nearby village (Lindfield), watching people feed fish in the local pond, and catching up on recent events.

Just now I had an excellent curry and pizza meal cooked by one of the leaders on the course, and we were joined by two of the other male students. Together we will be meeting during the course to chat about how things are going and pray, so it was a fun way to get to know each other a bit more.

Also today I got to speak to my girlfriend on the phone for a bit, which was great. God has an amazing sense of timing, which you just have to accept some times. All the time I was in Portsmouth, things might not have been right between us, but just as I left-the very day I left, we finally got together. But now I am here, and she is still there! So we just have to text/email/call each other to have regular contact, and she will very kindly come to see me some times too. I just have to expect that this time apart will help us when we are together more regularly again.

I hope you have had a good week, and that next week will be great too. Thanks for reading.

I'd like to start off this post by repeating something our course leader said today: "Eternity is too short to be with God".

Today is the last week-day of my first week on the YWAM DTS course at Holmsted Manor, Sussex, England. It has been a tremendous week, which has set the stage for an exciting, challenging, and rewarding few months.

Last night, after I had posted yesterday's blog entry, I realised that I had left my phone cover downstairs in the common room. Given that most of the lights were off in the house, I took my torch with me, so I could make it all the way downstairs without tripping down the stairs. After a while, I got to a section where the lights were on out in the hall, and when I got to the common room, the lights were on in the hall I was in. I'm not repeating this story for it's own sake, but just to say it got me thinking: the Bible says: "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path." (Psalm 119:105). The torch I took with me acted as God's word can in our lives. Also, the amount of light I had on my journey reminded me of the way it can be with God sometimes. At first all I had was the light from the torch, and some times, all you have is the smallest of voices from God. As I walked towards my destination, there was more and more light, and sometimes, you can hear God more clearly than at other times. However, you need to be on the right path to begin with-you have to be on the way to God. Where there is darkness, light will come and the darkness can not stand against it. God's light will have the victory. The motto of Portsmouth, the city I spent the last 8 years in before starting this course, is "Heaven's light, our guide". I pray for the day everyone there would live by that motto.

Back to today! Quiet time today was based around Psalm 103, focusing on verses 8 to 12: "The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.". This is another great reminder of God's love for each one of us. He has every right to deal with us according to the way we have treated Him-in that we have rejected Him, and abandoned His authority. It is the best thing on Earth to know, with your heart, not just your head, that "God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8). As I continue with this course, I find myself more and more enamoured with God. Before this course, I had a safe life, with a job where people liked me, and a great social life, but being here has already helped me experience more of what really matters than I remember for quite some time: God's love and his voice in my life. I don't think I could ever put in to words the way I am feeling right now. Everything here is just so right. And I wonder: why me? Why has God seen fit to bring me to this place, while billions of others suffer. I don't know why, in a way, but I know in this course I'll have opportunities to help some of thos less advantaged as me, and that will be great too. Also, I think: why not me? God's love is for everyone, and I was as much a person with my back to God as anyone else. I don't deserve any of this because of anything I've done, it is all down to who God is and what He wants for my life. I just pray I can do the things He wants me to, and that I will be the person He wants me to be.

We then had our second 'session' of sung worship. I appreciated this very much. I once heard a sermon where the preacher asked the question "Why would God encourage us to worship Him?", and then went on to explain that it is for our benefit, not just God's. We have all been made to worship. God has given us the freedom to choose what we worship. Some choose money, some power, some chocolate! However, we only find the true meaning of worship when we worship the creator of all the good things: God Himself. During the worship today, something happened which I have almost come to expect during sung worship times for me-I can't remember more than one or two times in the last few months where it hasn't happened: tears started streaming down my face again. I'm certainly not unhappy during these time of sung worship. They are tears of joy and a sign of my awe of God. As I just mentioned, I find it simply incredible that He would single me out for such remarkable experience. I would love for each one of you reading this to know the joy of coming close to your maker, the one who gives meaning to your life, and can set you free from the past, doubt, guilt, regrets, and anything else that may hinder your relationship with him. The other thing that happened was that I had a real sense of wanting to fly while worshiping. It wasn't enough to be confined to the floor. I wanted to worship in three dimensions. It bought to mind the title of an album released a few years ago by the worship leader of my church in Portsmouth: "Let Go: Learn to Fly". I think I am now learning what the title really is talking about. (Just in case you are wondering, I didn't actually fly today!)

The quiet time and sung worship made me feel hugged by God-in His arms and being given this time to rest. Again, I just hope that you will be able to have your own experiences with God that will help you to feel His love too. I later likened this time to being like a milkshake: bubbly, full of flavour, and sweet.

Then at about 11am, we started our first session on Descipleship. We heard how Christianity is not just about affirming beliefs, i.e. intellectual ascent, but it is about following Jesus in your life: his ways, deeds and experiences should be what we are aiming to see in our lives too. I thought of the phrase "Your lifestyle over His Lordship?". Do you really want to pick an easy life over the one that has been hand picked by the one who loves you, and accepts you no matter what you do? The course leader mentioned an example of a trapeze artist letting go, and being caught by their partner on another trapeze. If we can't fully let go of the things that we are holding on to, we can't let God take hold of us fully, and know what it is to have Him in control of our direction. This again got me thinking of "Let go: Learn to Fly".

Our practical task today was to think about, then write down a few things that we felt we should give up now we are here. We then had to nail the pieces of paper we wrote our lists on to a wooden cross we have in the classroom. The nail I chose had dried up bits of paint on it. When I hammered the nail in to the wood, the paint fell off the nail. I took this as a visual reminder of the nails that went in to the hands of Jesus on the cross: even the nails that were used by humanity to fix their maker to a murder weapon were washed in His blood. On the cross, Jesus said "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." (Luke 23:34). He is so willing to forgive us for anything we have done, even to the point of forgiving us for killing Him.

The last example of the day we were shown was an acorn. The leader explained that he does not see the acorn, he sees the potential for a huge tree, firmly rooted and with many branches, producing fruit. He said he wants each of us to know that in our lives too.

The afternoon shaped up quite similarly to yesterday: I got a bit of a work out cleaning the toilets (and I actually got to clean the toilets today, not just the floors), and then I played football for a couple of hours. In the first activity, I once again found myself realising how blessed I am in my life, and in the second, I discovered I might be quite good as a goal keeper! One of the reasons I chose to do this course was to change my lifestyle and get some exercise, so it is nice to find out that I can actually be quite good at something to do with football!

Dinner was also amazing. Thankfully the weather was good enough to be able to sit outside. I sat, and saw rabbits and pheasants in the field I was in, as well as a wide variety of trees and plants. God is so amazing. I've left my job, and ended up living in a magnificent mansion, surrounded by beautiful nature. Things that other strive their whole life to attain, but often burn out before they reach their goal. And what's more, those are just added extras on this course. I'm also getting great teaching and many opportunities to serve, and I'm meeting a mixture of fascinating people, all with great stories of their own.

I really ought to have written this on my laptop rather than my phone-I think my fingers might recover after a night's rest though! Thanks again for reading. I understand there may be quite a lot to read through here. I hope it is worth it. I'd like it that one day after I have finished the course, I can revisit this time through these postings too. Please feel free to add a comment to today's posting.

"Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright ©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved."